Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
