i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
