Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize