it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
