Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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