I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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