he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
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