i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
