i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
