i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize