Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize