whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
