just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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