Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(906): View more from Michigan

So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.

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(757): View more from Virginia

If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?

(269): View more from Michigan

Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.

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(506): View more from New Brunswick

Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident

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(319): View more from Iowa

I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds

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(513): View more from Ohio

The air taste purple.

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