I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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