If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize