I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
