im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
