Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
