So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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