Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize