i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
