All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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