Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
