yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize