Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
