does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize