I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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