god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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