i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize