I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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