you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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