i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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