i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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