help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
