Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
this must be what syphilis tastes like
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
You may now shotgun with the bride
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize