Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize