yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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