Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
COCAINE IS GR8
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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