I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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