Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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