it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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