wakey wakey hands off snakey
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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