He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
