this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
