he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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