I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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