I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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