the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
