Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
