dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize
